WHY THIS ALARMING breakup of FAMILY LIFE now sweeping the Western world?
Once again, notice where the living CREATOR places the blame. Notice man's view and
approach to humanity's problems and evils versus God's. Notice man's approach to solutions
versus God's.
In the beginning we quoted Jeremiah 50:6: "My people hath been lost sheep: their
shepherds have caused them to go astray."
That is only one of many such scriptures. Another, Jeremiah 23:1: "Woe be to the
pastors that destroy and scatter the sheep [human] of my pasture! saith the Eternal"
(verse 1). Then Jeremiah says: "Mine heart within me is broken because of the
prophets [preachers]; all my bones shake; I am like a drunken man ... For the land is full
of adulterers ... For both prophet and priest are profane; yea, in my house have I found
their wickedness, saith the Eternal" (Jer. 23:9-11).
There is the great wicked Spirit -- who has deceived the whole world (Rev. 12:9), who has
used his false ministers to withhold the true Gospel, and preach lies and deceits:
"For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the
apostles of Christ. And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of
light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the
ministers of righteousness" (II Cor. 11:13-15).
Jesus said MANY would come in HIS NAME representing themselves to be His ministers, yet
deceiving the MANY (Matthew 24:4-5).
Satan has swayed man to deal with the effect, ignoring the cause. For example, the
prevailing attitude toward divorce and remarriage. One looks at his present plight. He has
gone through the wringer of divorce. Of course he is the "injured party." Or, if
it's the wife, she is the innocent victim. What's the attitude? To look at the present
effect, and try to relieve the present suffering by a new marriage -- which means by
adultery. Two wrongs never make a right. A second sin never erases a first.
Some people have been misled by a book, written by a clergyman, on this subject. It's a
good example of the common approach and viewpoint. Some years before a fellow minister had
asked his opinion about whether the wronged, or innocent party to a divorce did not have a
"right" to remarry. The author had the OPINION that the Bible COULD be
interpreted to allow remarriage as a result of divorce on the grounds of adultery.
(Emphasized words are his.)
So he delved into a study: His motive? It seemed to him he owed it to these divorced
people to help solve their present problem -- the EFFECT resulting from a breaking of
God's Law. His object? To deal with the EFFECT -- to try to interpret the Scriptures to
suit his desired contention. Weeks later he submitted various ARGUMENTS (emphasized words
his) to other clergymen designed to show that the Word of God permitted a second marriage
to the "injured party."
He had qualms about this, because his denomination did not allow remarriage by divorced
persons. His one fear was what might happen to him.
Apparently he escaped his denomination's wrath, and fellow ministers urged him to write
the book on the subject.
Notice his approach: His motive: NOT to learn GOD'S VIEW, GOD'S purpose in marriage, GOD'S
Laws concerning marriage. NOT to get at the chaos of these unhappy divorcees' trouble, but
to start with the EFFECT and try to remedy that! His method? To INTERPRET -- or, rather,
to MISINTERPRET the Holy Word of God to twist it to say what he wanted it to say -- to
confirm his opinion!
Here was an example of what God means when He says: "Their shepherds [clergymen] have
caused them to go astray!"
I call to the reader's attention that this book has sought only GOD'S purposes, and GOD'S
Laws -- and looking to the chaos, not the EFFECT.
What Do You MEAN -- Divorce?
WHY do some completely MISUNDERSTAND the Bible teaching on Marriage and Divorce?
I have often said that error is most often arrived at by carelessly ASSUMING -- simply
taking for granted -- a false premise, and then basing all supporting arguments on that
false premise. The final conclusion is as false as the assumed false premise.
Many false beliefs on the subject of divorce and remarriage have been arrived at in this
way.
What comes to your mind, when the word "divorce" is used? It is commonly
ASSUMED, and it means in the minds of most people today, the cancelling out of a marriage
-- the UNBINDING of a marriage.
BUT NOT IN THE BIBLE!
In the Bible, what GOD has joined together, man is FORBIDDEN to separate or UNbind -- man
is UNABLE to UNbind what God has bound for LIFE. Only God could -- and God WON'T!
Most people have really lost sight of the fact that it is GOD who binds a marriage. I,
personally, did not understand the Bible or Bible teaching on this subject at the time of
my own marriage. I believed marriage was FOR LIFE, because that was the teaching I had
always heard, and I assumed it. I had known of very few divorces then. I knew my parents
were bound for life. So had my grandparents been. So were all my uncles and aunts. I
simply assumed that was the way it was supposed to be.
But when my own marriage occurred, I merely thought of going to the Courthouse and
obtaining a license -- which was PERMISSION of the County government to marry. I knew a
Justice of the Peace could legally perform the ceremony, but here again, in our family,
weddings had always been officiated by a minister. So my wife and I were married by a
minister. I didn't think of God's laws in connection with it. I simply did what others had
done. But I knew I was married FOR LIFE, and had no least thought of it ever ending until
death. Although I knew many very nice girls I respected and thought well of, I had never
known -- nor have I since -- any other I wanted to be my WIFE.
But today, people are growing up and facing marriage under radically different ideas and
practices in regard to marriage. Today there are 30 divorces to every 100 marriages.
Today people think of marriage as something merely licensed by and permitted by the STATE.
And in the eyes of the STATE divorce ENDS the marriage. The State binds it, and the State
unbends it -- by divorce.
OUR PEOPLE TODAY HAVE FORGOTTEN GOD!
They forget that marriage, though a physical union, is A DIVINE INSTITUTION! They forget
that it is GOD who binds together a man and woman as ONE. They ignore that God does not
UNbind what He has bound.
They FORGET -- or simply do not realize -- that in the Bible there is NO SUCH THING as a
divorce in the sense of UNbinding a bound marriage, bound by the Eternal Creator GOD! They
ASSUME, in complete ERROR, that a divorce by the State wipes out a marriage, and frees one
to marry a second husband or wife -- and a third -- and a fourth -- etc., etc., etc.
People today NEVER THINK of a divorced woman being married to another man as being AN
ADULTERESS, instead of a "wife." Or a divorced man married to another woman (by
man's law) as AN ADULTERER instead of that woman's "husband." Yet that is
precisely what they are -- so SAYS GOD!
The Bible nowhere speaks of divorce, in the sense people think of divorce today. In the
Bible it is speaking only of separation, made legal -- or, made public, or official.
Since divorce in Judah had become fairly common by the time of Christ, even they had come
to think of it as severing a marriage -- UNbinding what God had bound.
So the Pharisees looked at Deuteronomy 24:1-4. And what did it just naturally mean to
them? They ASSUMED without question it was talking about a married man, bound in marriage,
writing out a bill of DIVORCE, severing, unbending the marriage. And so do most people
view it today. That is the ERRONEOUS PREMISE carelessly ASSUMED, upon which their
conclusion is based. The same with God's bill of SEPARATION in Jeremiah 3:8. They overlook
that later, verse 14, God says He still IS (present tense), MARRIED to Israel.
Some read the first few verses of Jeremiah 3, and ASSUME it is GOD saying "If a man
put away his wife ...." in verse 1, referring to Deuteronomy 24. But what Jeremiah
wrote represented God as saying, "THEY say" -- the people are saying. Then they
jump to erroneous conclusions.
God's Church cannot do that.
God's Church must, first, know God's PURPOSE in marriage, and then GOD'S LAWS, consistent
with that purpose.
We must realize that the word "divorce" DOES NOT MEAN the same thing in the
Bible it probably does to most of us today.
Betrothed Woman Called "WIFE"
Another common erroneous assumption leading to false conclusions is that the word
"wife" means always a married woman bound to a husband -- or, that the word
"husband" always refers to a married man bound by God to a wife.
But it has been shown that in Matthew 1:19 Joseph was called Mary's HUSBAND before
"they came together" (verse 18), and the angel spoke to Joseph of Mary as
"Mary thy wife" (verse 20), although she was merely then "espoused to
Joseph" (verse 18). Joseph had not yet "taken unto him Mary his wife,"
(verse 20).
Again, in Deuteronomy 22:23, a "damsel that is a virgin be betrothed unto an
HUSBAND" is referred to in verse 24 as the betrothed man's WIFE, although still an
unmarried "damsel that is a virgin."
This bit of MISUNDERSTANDING leads many to suppose, erroneously, that when Matthew 5:32
quotes Jesus saying, "But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife,
saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery," the
"wife" could mean ONLY a wife bound in marriage. But the word "wife"
refers, biblically, to both a betrothed yet UNmarried woman and also to one BOUND in
marriage.
What Jesus is saying in Matthew 5:32 is this:
A woman is biblically called a man's wife from the time of betrothal -- prior to the
marriage. The man taking advantage of Jesus' exception clause, "saving for the cause
of fornication," is a man who, upon marriage to his betrothed wife, as in Deuteronomy
22:20, finds her not a virgin, but having committed fornication. Under these
circumstances, where the marriage was fraudulent on her part and the husband was deceived,
he could refuse to consummate the marriage -- reject her -- put her away unbound. But if
he did not put her away while still unbound, but did put her away later, after living with
her as husband and after being bound to her for life, the divorce does not UNbind the
marriage, and he causes her to commit adultery, assuming she will go to another man. She
is not eligible to marry any other. If she does she becomes an adulteress, and her husband
caused her to commit adultery by putting her away from him.
In Matthew 19 Jesus expressed it a little differently. "Whosoever shall put away his
wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery"
(verse 9). Unless he put her away upon marriage, and upon discovery of the fraud, thus
rejecting her before consummating the marriage -- before being bound (in which case he was
still single), then to put her away later, while bound for life to her, and have a civil
marriage to another woman would be committing adultery. And whoever married the wife bound
to him would also commit adultery.
The principle here is that of fraud on the part of one of the betrothed. In this case,
literally, the wife represented herself as a virgin. This was a deception. At the
marriage, the husband was accepting her conditionally in this case the condition being
that she was, as represented to be, a virgin. On discovery, after the marriage ceremony,
of the deception, he rejected her. For this cause -- discovered prior fornication -- he
put her away. He did not accept her.
It is like a man having made a contract to purchase a house and lot. The contract is
conditioned on clear title and certain conditions to be found in the house. If the title
is found not clear, and other conditions are not met, the buyer refuses to accept the
house, refuses to pay for it. The deal is off -- never consummated.
The principle involved here is the same. Take the case of a betrothed wife, who became
betrothed to spite another who had jilted her. As she enters the marriage ceremony, her
mind rebels -- she knows she is not intending to really be a wife to the man she is
marrying. But she lacks the courage to back out of the ceremony at the last moment, and
more to spite the one who jilted her than any other reason she goes through the ceremony.
On the wedding night she refuses to consummate the marriage, but fails to explain her
reason. A second or third night she tries to "go through with it," but finally
rebels and refuses. The next day she leaves with her mother on a trip, returning after
several weeks. Again she makes a show of trying to yield sexually, but does only in a most
unsatisfactory and hostile manner. Then she goes back to mother again and divorces the
man. This case was then brought to the Church. And being satisfied, by responsible
witnesses, that events as here stated were true, the Church ruled that there had been
deception, or fraud, in the ceremony. The man did not know there was fraud involved till
he brought the case before the Church. According to God's Word, God had not bound the
marriage. She had not, in sincerity, taken him to be her husband, nor had she intended to
be to him a wife. She had obtained a legal divorce. He was still, in God's sight,
unmarried. Later he entered into a bound marriage with another.
This incident will serve to illustrate the principle involved in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9. It
does not allow for divorce from a bound marriage nor does it allow any second bound
marriage. Sometimes fraud in a marriage is not discovered for some time -- perhaps a few
years. Then the status of the injured one is difficult to determine, but the time-element
must be weighed.
What Constitutes Marriage?
Just what does constitute marriage? WHEN, and under what conditions, is one bound by the
living God to a mate? When is it a marriage, bound in God's sight, and when is it not a
marriage?
We live, today, in the END-time. We live in a permissive society that has lost knowledge
of and contact with its God. Marriage is generally taken quite lightly. There has been
confusion for thousands of years about marriage, divorce, and remarriage, but more than
ever today.
The very PURPOSE for the institution of marriage is intertwined with God's PURPOSE in
placing human life on the earth. The basic law of God respecting marriage is stated within
the very account of the creation of man.
It begins in the first chapter in the Bible: "So God created man in his own image, in
the image of God created he him: male and female created he them. And God blessed them,
and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth" (Genesis
1:27-28). And, "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall
cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (Gen. 2:24).
The PURPOSE is to establish and maintain FAMILY LIFE, preparing humans for immortal family
life in the Kingdom of God (which is the divine FAMILY OF GOD).
Notice, first, this basic law establishing the marriage institution says "a man shall
leave his father and his mother ..." The Hebrew word relates to forsaking or leaving
the parental home, and establishing a new home and family. Of course the fifth Commandment
requires honor and respect to parents, whether in or apart from their home.
Before the marriage, the two young people experienced (or so it was intended) a family
relationship in two separate households. Their marriage changes that situation. From the
two parental households emerges a third family, starting with a new husband-and-wife
relationship, from which children shall be born.
Notice, next, in this basic marriage law: "... and shall cleave unto his wife."
The original Hebrew word translated "cleave" means literally to cling, or to
adhere. Elsewhere the same Hebrew word is translated to take, or to stick. Jesus referred
to and confirmed this basic marriage law in Matthew 19:5, and Mark 10. The Greek word
there for "cleave" means literally to glue and is elsewhere translated join.
The whole emphasis of this original basic law shows the union is to be a binding one.
Many have assumed that a marriage is bound by a vow. The Bible nowhere uses the word vow
in connection with marriage, but it does refer to it with a word directly related to the
word "cleave." In Malachi 2:14, referring to the wife, it states: "She is
thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant."
Marriage is a covenant with God between husband and wife. It is a type of the New Covenant
with Christ. It is referred to thus in Ezekiel 16 and elsewhere. It is a formal, solemn,
and binding agreement or compact. A betrothal is an agreement or compact to be later
married, between the two who are betrothed. But the MARRIAGE is an agreement, compact, or
covenant they make WITH GOD, who binds it for the remainder of the natural lives of the
couple.
Most people being married today do not understand God's laws regarding marriage, or even
God's part in it. But though they may be totally oblivious of the fact, God is part of
every marriage. Few indeed, today, have any conception of the magnitude of their covenant
with God, but ignorant of it or not, it is binding, and all will be judged accordingly in
the final judgment. Ignorance does not remove the validity and binding force of this very
serious covenant with which, regardless of knowledge, God is none the less directly
involved.
The third major element of the basic marriage law of Genesis 2:24 is that the married
couple become "one flesh" -- "... and they shall be one flesh."
From two entities -- the families of the groom and the bride, now emerge a new and third
entity -- another "one flesh" -- another family unit.
The "one flesh" includes sexual intercourse, and it can be illegal and too often
is. This is shown in I Corinthians 6:16: "What? know ye not that he which is joined
to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh." In marriage this
relationship is honorable (Heb. 13:4) and is commanded in Gen. 1:28; I Cor. 7:3-5 and
elsewhere. This relationship in marriage is sacred and holy, unless used in an unnatural,
lustful or perverted way. God intended it for HOLY use, not lustful or perverted use. It
was intended to be a supreme expression of LOVE (not lust), and love is an outgoing
concern and affection toward the one loved.
Sex in marriage is a prime agent in cementing and gluing a marriage together. In an
ever-tightening way, just like glue that becomes a tighter bond as it ages, sexual
intercourse in marriage, with a right attitude of mind, cements a marriage tighter as the
years go by. One of the most colossal abominations today -- one of humanity's greatest
tragedies -- is the wrong use of sex -- both in and out of marriage. Pre-marital
promiscuity, adultery in marriage, and even lustful or perverted use of sex between
husband and wife can cause serious mental and moral injury to participants.
There are obviously certain qualifications and disqualifications for a valid marriage:
1) The couple must be male and female. In this end time of abominable immorality, even
some ecclesiastics are approving "marriage of two homosexuals or two lesbians."
Valid marriage can be only between male and female (Genesis 1:27-28 and 2:24).
2) In this day of the IMoral "New Morality," of sexual promiscuity, when
probably a considerable majority of young men and women have experienced pre-marital
sexual intercourse, the Church would rule that, if a young man marries a girl without
first questioning her regarding virginity, if he discovers absence of virginity upon
marriage it could not be evidence of fraud. Since it is probable today that in a majority
of cases the girl is not a virgin, and since today a broken hymen is not necessarily
evidence of previous sexual intercourse, it should normally be expected that in many, if
not most cases, no evidence of virginity would be found.
If a young man is unwilling to marry any but a virgin, due to present unmoral conditions,
he should ascertain the truth from the girl before marriage. Truly, we live in the Western
world in a condition where the land has been abominably polluted.
There still are a few young men qualified to enter upon marriage without themselves having
committed fornication. In this era of frankness about sex, if such a man feels he is
entitled to a virgin for a wife, he should ask the girl her own status. Then, if she lies
and deceives him, he could reject her immediately after marriage, if he is that "hard
hearted." Today it is better for converted Spirit begotten young people to forgive
and forget.
What, then, constitutes a valid marriage?
When two people, of marriageable age, sincerely and solemnly covenant with each other, in
the presence of witnesses, to take each other as husband and wife, then upon consummating
that covenant agreement by becoming "one flesh" in sexual intercourse, they are
bound for their natural lives by the Eternal God. Since all are commanded to be subject to
the civil powers of government, the marriage should be only by legal marriage license.
God is witness to all marriage covenants. He, and He alone, joins the marriage bond. It is
He who "glues" the marriage, not the minister, rabbi, priest, judge, Justice of
the Peace or other human. But of course propriety dictates there should be a ceremony.
When such a union is joined by God, as Jesus said, "What therefore GOD hath joined
together, let not man put asunder" (Mark 10:9; Matt. 5:31, 32; 19:6; Rom. 7:1-3; Gen.
2:24). In God's sight man CANNOT put asunder-UNjoin what God has so bound.
These are plain, clear statements in God's Word. They need no interpreting. Arguments
based on "obscure" or difficult to understand texts do not reverse them.
God simply makes no provision in His Word for divorce and remarriage in the modern usage
of those terms.
Marriage is a very serious relationship, ended only by death. It is a very intimate
relationship. The two become ONE -- sharing life's problems, troubles, successes together.
Much depends on right selection of a life companion. Much depends on ATTITUDE. Much
depends upon LOVE -- remembering that love is outgoing concern for the good, welfare,
happiness of the other!
God says this about LOVE. Love is very patient. Are You? Love is kind -- are you? Love is
not easily provoked. How about you? Love is never selfish -- are you?
A marriage can be happy and successful. Read our booklets: "Your Marriage Can Be
Happy" and "Modern Dating."
When you understand the PURPOSE of marriage, the permanency and the seriousness of
marriage, it becomes obvious that God wants us to learn a very important lesson. He wants
us to be very careful about entering into a marriage covenant relationship. We should
exercise all caution, take adequate time to make the right decision.
A person contemplating marriage should use his head as well as his heart. Our book,
"The Missing Dimension in Sex" (free) should be considered essential reading, as
well as the booklets on Dating and Marriage.
Tragic Cases
Because this world has been so universally and grossly deceived -- because this world's
clergy, themselves deceived into serving the god of this world and withholding the TRUTH
of God -- because of the deteriorated, immoral, permissive society in which today's
generation has been reared, God's laws have been violated. Tragic situations have
resulted.
God's purpose is to create wholesome and happy FAMILIES, based on holy and love-bound
marriages. God's purpose is to protect and preserve happy families.
That is also our purpose in serving Him -- not to break up families.
In teaching GOD'S TRUTH about marriage, our purpose is to guide people into forming happy
marriages and a tight family structure. But because the clergy has withheld God's TRUTH
about marriage, many tragic circumstances have developed.
God says: My people are DESTROYED for lack of knowledge: Because thou hast rejected
knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing that thou
hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children." So says God to
the ministers who have failed to teach the people GOD'S LAWS -- and especially in regard
to marriage.
There are many tragic cases today where there had been a marriage, often hasty and
ill-considered. After a few months it ended in divorce, as we know divorce today. Then
they each married another. Children were born of this marriage -- now three, four, or five
children, two or three of these still quite young. Yet these marriages were adulterous,
not bound by God.
Now these victims of the popular false but so-called Christian NO-LAW teaching learn God's
TRUTH about marriage and divorce.
Perhaps one -- either a husband or wife -- has become a begotten child of God -- knows he
or she cannot continue living as an adulterer or adulteress.
What TRAGEDY!
There are children. There are now property rights and considerations. There are family and
relatives. If one now dares obey God, the persecution will be heavy and full of
self-righteous indignation. The Church will be persecuted, accused of "breaking up
families," although our whole effort is to preserve family life.
But to most people, GOD IS NOT IN THE PICTURE! Obey God, and people literally HATE YOU! I
said in the beginning this truth will make some readers extremely ANGRY. Suddenly they
will become more "righteous" than God.
How do they look at the situation? They see the EFFECT -- a family built on an adulterous
marriage. They want to deal solely with the EFFECT. Whatever RELIEVES the situation
carnally, they want to do -- and they will become very "righteous" in it.
"That family OUGHT NOT BE BROKEN UP!" they say, in hot indignation. If one of
the parties to an adulterous marriage, caused by a clergy that has withheld God's Laws
from the people -- even taught that God's Laws were done away -- and also caused by a
society which has loved to have it so -- I say if one of the parties to this unfortunate
adulterous marriage wants to OBEY ALMIGHTY GOD, others will wax HOT with indignation!
Perhaps cases just like this is what Jesus' disciples had in mind, when, after Jesus
answered the Pharisees in Matthew 19:3-9, they asked: "If the case of the man be so
with his wife, it is not good to marry."
How did Jesus answer this? He replied, "All men cannot receive this saying, save them
to whom it is given." Which is to say, all men are unable or unwilling to obey and
live as they must to enter the Kingdom of God. Jesus never said it was the easy way.
Then Jesus said, "For there are some eunuchs, which were so born ... and there are
some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made
themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let
him receive it" (Matt. 19:10-12).
Jesus never once compromised with God's Law. God is a God of MERCY. But He also is a God
of JUSTICE, and rather than compromise one-millionth of an inch with His Law, Jesus gave
His life to pay the penalty we have incurred by breaking it.
Sometimes it becomes a matter of how much are we willing to suffer -- how much are we
willing to sacrifice to be obedient and enter into the Kingdom of God?
Remember, "There is a way which seemeth RIGHT unto a man, but the end thereof are the
ways of death" (Prov. 14:12).
I repeat once again: "For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not
worthy to be compared with the GLORY which shall be revealed in us" (Romans 8:18).